"Red Wine."
A few weeks ago, as C. and I were bravely making our way through a particularly terrible bottle of red wine, I remembered about this blog (I'm sorry, I'm sorry, baby you know I love you) and quickly snatched up the bottle to look at exactly what kind of unholy grape we were drinking.
Quick aside -- I know this is a wine blog, but you guys know a thing or two about whiskey, right? You know, probably, that a lot of the time it comes from Ireland or Scotland or Kentucky or Tennessee; you know and love/hate its burn; you know that people put ice in it, to "open up the flavor." You may also know that sometimes they are called "single malt" and sometimes they are called "blended malt" and sometimes they are just called "blended," and probably you know from firsthand experience that single malt whiskey is, like, way expensive omg. The reason for this -- stay with me, guys -- is that single malt whiskey is made from only one kind of grain and only at one distillery, which makes it more pure, and makes it taste better, et cetera.
Blends, on the other hand, are made by blending -- that is, blending different distilleries' whiskies or even different kinds of whiskey altogether. Throw everything together, and it's still alcoholic, right? Cheaper for them, cheaper for you, just try to make sure you get that shot in the back of your mouth so it doesn't hit your taste buds.
So: whiskey can be blended. That's fine. That's a fine thing. God knows I've had enough blended whiskey to be able to start a second blog. But wine, though? Wine is something different. Wine is sophisticated. Classy. Traditional. Pure.
This is what I learned from our terrible, terrible wine that night: blended wine exists!
"Jack's Blend," the label declared, and then, on the line below, by way of explanation: "Red Wine." Nothing else.
Of course, we finished the bottle. But we weren't happy about it.
VERDICT: DO NOT BUY.
